I woke up on Monday to the radio telling me that the gullible rubes running this very unserious country have announced that AI is to be “mainlined into the veins” of the nation, a policy based entirely on the latest eructation from the Tony Blair Institute. I didn’t know that the TBI had any ideas apart from ID cards, but I’m beginning to wish they hadn’t.

It is curious that there’s never any money to invest in actual solutions, yet as soon there’s an unproven technical scheme involving magic beans, they’re tripping over themselves to throw funding at it faster than you can say “monorail”. They claim that:

AI can transform the lives of working people – it has the potential to speed up planning consultations to get Britain building, help drive down admin for teachers so they can get on with teaching our children, and feed AI through cameras to spot potholes and help improve roads.

This is madness. Local councils, who are responsible for most roads, are chronically underfunded. The problem with potholes is less the spotting, and more the fixing. If you gave the money to councils instead of squandering it on AI, they might be able to fill them in. But as things stand, this is worse than useless.

The money wasted on a magic educational paperwork wizard could be better spent improving staffing, pay, and conditions in schools, rather than forcing them to magic up money for pay rises from nowhere through “efficiencies”.

As for how they think AI can speed up planning consultations, I have no idea at all.

Also, I’d rather keep AI out of my veins, thank you very much.

I made melon kimchi. We ended up with too many melons from our vegetable box, so I cut up the older one and put it in a fermenting jar with grated carrot and all the usual ancillary ingredients. It took a few days to get going – perhaps there’s less lactobacillus than on the surface of a cabbage – but once it did it caught up quickly. I tried some at the weekend, and it’s delicious. Recommended.

I had nine meetings on Thursday. Eight Teams meetings and, for a bit of variety, one on whatever Google’s video platform is called these days. It should be illegal.

I bought a tiny USB C laptop charger so that I don’t have to lug around the one that came with my laptop. It’s a 65 W GaN charger with folding pins made by UGREEN. I had a bit of trouble with the cable: I ordered a 100 W USB C cable, but I received an identical-looking cable that had no mention of the power rating at all, and it completely failed to work. I sent it back and bought a different 100 W cable that worked fine.

USB C is a mess: one connector with a dozen different incompatible cables that are visually indistinguishable from each other. I don’t know how you’d explain this to an average person who hasn’t addled their brain with technology.

Southwark Council have replaced the lights in our street. They used to be a cylindrical shape that cast more light sideways than down, to the extent that I complained to the council who came and stuck a “shield” on the side facing our house so that it didn’t illuminate the front bedroom like a football stadium.

They’ve replaced the lamp units with modern fixtures that shine downwards. The street is better lit, and there’s much less general light pollution. The lights are still much brighter than they need to be, though. I only need to find my way along the street, not play five-a-side.

They new units seem to have a daylight sensor on the top to determine when they should come on, instead of being based on a timer. That should be more accurate in responding to the need for illumination, and I suppose it will be handy if we have another Tambora or Krakatoa or similar.

I found a CD of the Twin Peaks soundtrack in a charity shop on Wednesday, and listened to it at home that evening. The next day, I heard that David Lynch was dead, and I can’t help thinking that it was somehow my fault.

A CD case containing the Twin Peaks soundtrack on a table

The murder weapon

Do not think about The Event.

Instead, here is a selection of links for your delectation: